England vs India needs something more than softer balls as the shape that defines this Test series is a sphere.
England vs India need big nuts for the Test series, not soft balls.
The introduction of a little niggle, the grit in the Lord’s oyster, was welcome because the England vs. India match started with a lot of apparent camaraderie between the teams. Most international players are IPL buddies these days.
Unfortunately, no one flung any jelly beans, but as both sides tried to gain an advantage, there was a lot of verbal sparring, finger-pointing, and crowd participation. We frequently discuss the “theatre” of Test cricket, which is assumed to have grandiloquent dramatic stanzas, epic plotlines, and heroic achievements. However, when players begin to prattle around as if they were putting on Dick Whittington at the Bedford Corn Exchange, it’s also worth getting in the popcorn.
The initial exclamations of “He’s behind you!” may have started when England’s adorable tactic of bringing the keeper up to the stumps to halt the Shubman Gill run machine may have been used. But when the England opener chose the obvious time-wasting strategy of calling on the physio after a ball struck the middle of his bat, Gill took centre stage during a heated mini-mini-session at the end of day three. He yelled at Zak Crawley to “grow some f***ing balls” and then mimed for an impact substitute (back to the IPL again).
Maybe Gill was just attempting to think of a workable solution because of the issues with the Dukes balls in this series. Of all the England players, Crawley most closely resembles a member of the landowner class who could devote farming resources to developing a cutting-edge substitute for leather and cork.
Well, based on the subsequent hand motions, it’s more likely that he was referring to cojones. Even with Alex Carey’s underhanded and underarm tactics to get things going, Lord’s may not be the best place to hold a royal rumble, but there was a WWE vibe to the event.
Washington Sundar enticed everyone with some brash conversation of his own, while Mohammed Siraj played to his “heel” reputation and received a fine for his efforts.
In order to create a final-day atmosphere that evoked the days when men were men and teams bowled 100 overs in a day, England, to top it all off, ripped up the pious script they had followed under Brendon McCullum. After the dust settled, the fighters shook hands and gave each other hugs, serious displays of respect and fraternal affection. So long as they return to the Punch and Judy material when the series returns to Old Trafford the following week, that’s okay.